ode to missy

missy, missy, missy

it seems you've thrown a little hissy

over a picture on my blog

of your head back & sawing logs

of course, i didn't mean to make you mad

make you cry and scream and be sad

so now let me try to explain

(though my defense you may find lame)

I posted that picture in fun

Just like I would've done to anyone

Had it been Ken, Matt, or even Addie Lou

Their drooling pics would be on here too

But alas it was YOU who fell asleep

Totally zonked, not even making a peep

How could I resist such a photo op?

We were giggling about it non stop!

But now let me please repeat

that I meant absolutely NO deceit 

I think Missy Mae is 'da bomb

And of course if the finest of moms

She's so funny and nice and cute

And has a nice ass to boot 

She's a great wife, mother, and friend

And i'll love her til the end

(even if she now hates me

and wants to drown me in the sea)

So please know that I'm so, so sorry

And think you're better than the Mata Hari!

I love you Missy.

Perhaps I can make it up to you by posting some 

rather unattractive pictures of myself 

(thank you photo booth on my mac):

tagged

What's your husband's name? Matt 'puff hair' Olsen

How long have you guys been married? 3 years

How long did you date? 1+ years

How old is he? 25

Who eats more sweets? me. definitely.

Who said "I love you" first? he did. and to clarify, it was, "i love you, man"

Who is taller? matt, but only by a foot.

Who is the better singer? matt's idol voice is better than anything i've got. hands down.

Who does the laundry? me. usually. he helps fold and put away.

Who pays the bills? moi.

Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? me if you're looking at the bed

Who mows the lawn? thank you bob plumb (our landlord)

Who cooks dinner? that would be carl's jr, olive garden, training table, apple bee's, etc.

Who drives? it depends. i get car sick easily, so if i'm feeling punchy, i'm manning the wheel.

Who's the first to admit they are wrong? not me.

Who kissed who first? matt. on our first date. talk about rico suave.

Who asked out who first? We went on a blind date.

Who wears the pants? i think that would be me. we talk about most things, but i'm the 'god' of our relationship (was that blasphemous?!).

we're baaaccckkk

we've actually been back since sunday night, but i've been too busy (okay, and lazy) to post any pictures. we had a blast and are already planning our trip back.

a definite shout out goes to brian and norma for the lovely motel 6 hotel room and the fantabulous cabin,and to mama dahl for the car. the dvd player was a life saver.

photo diary

our trip, in no particular order:

missy getting some sleep on the way home (sorry missy, i couldn't resist posting this...)

what's yellowstone without som wildlife?

lovely ladies

our last day :(

addie

elise riding a white buffalo (?) in cody, wyoming

spaz

after our 4wheelin' ride

suiting up for an early morning ride up the banncok in 'big red'--a coat that missy's dad made

carefully crossing the river

matt crossing the log he knocked into the river for me to cross--right before he fell in. thank goodness for gortex shoes!

ride 'em cowboy...er girl.

matthew's family

purtty mountains

elise was a total trooper

so matt heard a noise the first morning at the cabin but didn't see anything out the window. later that morning we found huge bear tracks all around the cabin (a grizzley was shot in august after having broken into a few of the cabins up there).

that thayne family cabin...our home away from home!

elise and her pink boots. they were about two sizes two big and watching her waddle around in them was one of the cutest things ever.

missy & addie

on our way to the cabin we stopped at the 'boiling river' in mammoth so the boys could take a dip. you couldn't have paid me enough to go in...it was freaking freezing outside.

all bundled up

after having squash for lunch. yum.

and we're off

cooke city, here we come! we're taking off tonight with 

ken, missy and girls (elise & adele) for a few days of relaxation and snuggling in their lovely montana cabin. 

maybe we won't come back.

four years ago when we went (right after we started dating)

and a shout out to my bitchin' mama who is letting us take 

her car so we can all drive together.  love you blockhead.

a truly spooktacular event

matt and i decided to keep with tradition this year and have a halloween party at my parents place in charleston. we didn't take nearly enough pictures, but the ones we do have are gold:

christopher k.

making all the girls jealous

starting the squat thrusts...

the gang:

beach bums, mario & luigi, super heros, 'cereal' killers, cowboys

it was so nice to see everyone (minus ryan & megan), catch up, hang out, and play the ever wonderful dice game.

until next year.

mac-alicious

enjoy

fish face

pop!

matt's model face...

the two headed beasts

munchkin

i look so freaking ugly.  words can't describe...

quirks, me?!

Merilee tagged me to name 6 quirks about myself.  I don't actually know what she's talking about, as I have no quirks.  Yeah right.  Buckle up and enjoy the ride.

1.) I have to have one foot out of the covers when going to bed--which is odd because growing up I was so deathly afraid of spiders that I had to be completely bundled, even strategically placing my hair over my ears (as opposed to tucking it behind my ears) so that a spider couldn't crawl in (thanks 'Arachnophobia'--the movie, not the disorder).  Though I'm still deathly afraid of spiders, I don't observe the same psychotic compulsion to have every body part tucked safely in my covers.

2.) My pet peeve: the way people eat.  I can't say that it's necessarily poor manners, because even the most refined cotillion trained person can drive me up the wall.  I'm just easily annoyed when it comes to the way some people eat.  Unfortunately, Matt gets the brunt of my frustration.  

3.) It's embarrassing, but I get sucked into gossipy magazines.  I don't actually purchase them, not often, at least, but do get my gossip fill online.  I don't know why I care about Bragelina, Suri Cruise, or Posh and her non-smiling ways.  

4.) Like Merilee, I have a hair thing.  I spend too much time doing my hair and am very particular about how it's done.  If I have a bad hair day, it seriously effects the way I feel about myself for the rest of the day.  Call me shallow, but it's just how I roll.

5.) I'm a blog stalker.  I find myself clicking on random people's blogs and then becoming engrossed in their lives.  I want to know if they got the job, proposed to the girl, or painted their bedroom yellow as planned.  It's a problem.  I'll admit it.

6.) I hold people to sometimes unrealistic expectations.  I think this stems from the fact that I hold myself to unrealistic expectations and that I can be kind of uptight...ie: I was always a nerdy student who came straight home and did her homework, got projects done ahead of time, started studying weeks before the test, etc.  As I watch Matt go through school, I have to bite my tongue because he waits until the last minute for everything, putting bike rides, tv, etc. in front of homework.  I think I'm intrinsically this way, though, because I'm jealous of people who can be spontaneous, carefree, etc.  I have to know what's going on, what to plan for, etc.  

So, now that I have officially unleashed my true freakiness, have a lovely Friday.  

the breast, i mean best, pumpkin pic around

Fall is upon us

with winter waiting in the wings I decided to take a quick trip up and enjoy some of the fall colors before mountain biking season comes to a bitter-sweet end. Enjoy some of the pics:

This is some of the sweet single track somewhere between Park City Mountain Resort and The Canyons...
Aspens-mmmmmmmm.......
The trusty single-speed, hand built by yours truly.

Pretty cool contrast with the bright yellow and dark greens.

what a weekend

first thing's first: you must ALL see the movie 'ghost town.'  it's seriously the best movie i've seen in a LONG time.  not only is it freaking hilarious (seriously, i cried from laughing so hard), but it's got a great message with great acting (greg kinnear...need i say more?!).  

secondly, feast your eyes upon our newest family addition:

that's right. an imac. we've switched from the dark, dark world of pc's to that much brighter, lighter, and more gloriously wonderful world of macs. halle-freakin'-lujah! my dad got us a slammin' deal through his business and we just couldn't pass it by.  well, I couldn't pass it by.  so, we're now a family of three (i won't tell which family member i love most...).

boobs. knockers. rack. melons. fun bags.

For years and years they told me,

Be careful of your breasts.

Don't ever squeeze or bruise them.

And give them monthly tests.

So I heeded all their warnings,

And protected them by law.

Guarded them very carefully,

And always wore my bra.

After 30 years of astute care,

My GYNO, Dr Pruitt,

Said I should get a Mammogram

"OK," I said, "let's do it."

"Stand up here close" she said to me,

(She got my boob in line),

"And tell me when it hurts," she said,

"Ah yes! Right there, that's fine."

She stepped upon a pedal,

I could not believe my eyes!

A plastic plate came slamming down,

My hooters in a vise!

My skin was stretched and mangled,

From underneath my chin.

My poor boob was being squashed,

To Swedish Pancake thin.

Excruciating pain I felt,

Within it's viselike grip.

A prisoner in this vicious thing,

My poor defenseless tit!

"Take a deep breath," she said to me,

Who does she think she's kidding?!?

My chest is mashed in her machine,

And woozy I am getting.

"There, that's good," I heard her say,

(The room was slowly swaying.)

"Now, let's have a go at the other one."

Have mercy, I was praying.

It squeezed me from both up and down,

It squeezed me from both sides.

I'll bet SHE'S never had this done,

To HER tender little hide.

Next time that they make me do this,

I’m request a blindfold.

I have no wish to see again,

My knockers getting steam rolled.

If I had no problem when I came in,

I surely have one now.

If there had been a cyst in there,

It would have gone "ker-pow!"

This machine was created by a man,

Of this, I have no doubt.

But I will have it done again

And never give a shout!

please, please, PLEASE have a mammogram.

love your boobs!